First Post, Location Unknown

Tada!  The first real post ever on "Missing."  Searching through the archives today, I realized I was not very diligent about keeping track of the locations of these posters.  But you probably don't care much about that anyway.  Right?  (psst...say yes).  We know that this dog was lost on Northwood Avenue, somewhere USA.  Or maybe the owner lives there.  Maybe they should have specified.  If you're using a crappy monitor, I'll tell you what it says.

"PLEASE HELP!  20 Northwood Avenue, Yellow Lab Mix, Black/Blue Tongue, Sweet Dog, Male Neutered, Had Chain Attached, Name is 'Stush,' (Rhymes with Hush), North Main Area"

So, I have to admit, the first time I saw this, I thought it was a baby seal in the snow, and I'd found a real gem of a poster.  But it's only Stush, the yellow lab mix.  I truly hope someone else did not mistake him for a baby seal and clubbed him to save their salmon fishery.  (I'm looking your way Paul McCartney.  Don't prove me right.)  Let's see...other jokes.  Ah, got one.  Maybe he wouldn't have ran away if you didn't beat the shit out of his tongue.  Get it?  Black/blue tongue?  I know.  It's not great.  Anyway, good luck finding your way home Stush.  I hope whoever has that phone number I blocked out finds you.  But what I really hope is that Stush is living peacefully with polar bears and eskimos in the great white north, along with his other seal buddies.