He Doesn't Look Like A Harley. More Like a Vespa.

Maybe at one time, he was a badass, but in this picture, he looks pretty bummed.  Introducing Harley.  He used to cruise around the country with his bitch, tough as nails, but after the hip dysplasia kicked in, he couldn't shift his bike any more, and had to retire to Wheeler Rd.  Wheeler Rd, a fitting reminder of his glory days.  Here's the text.

"Missing Dog, Harley is a golden retriever mix.  He is very friendly.  He went missing from the Wheeler Rd. area.  We miss him very much.  Any information please call.  Thanks."


Who are you thanking?  And doesn't it seem suspicious that reward is written in ink next to the text?  My theory; someone else just wrote that in.  Maybe the guy who stole poor Harley.  When he saw there was no reward mentioned, he just strolled up and wrote it in.  Kind of an uncreative ransom note.  Sure, that's probably what happened.

Harley looks pretty damn old.  Maybe he took off in his dog RV for retirement.  Maybe he just spontaneously turned to dust.  He doesn't look too happy, does he?  But you know what they say.  The camera adds ten years of self loathing and agony.  And that's, like, sixteen thousand in dog years.  Wait, that's not how that goes.  Or that.  Nevermind.  Good luck, Harley.